What the Hull?

Unfocused thoughts and random diary entries on the journey through life.

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Saturday, October 30, 2004

Finished with my folks Pc at last! They've just taken it away. It's really quiet thanks to my application of a circular saw, some vibration dampeners, filtered quiet fans, rounded cables and stuff. I'm now thinking mine's too noisy.. not sure if I want to start chopping at my brushed aluminium case though. It's looking like a night in for this puppy. Bill & Mel are already in whitby, I called but missed them :( Cats at angies for a night in, Zoe's working, my usual club gets packed with strangers every halloween otherwise I'd just go there and see who's out.

posted by martin 17:34

Ourang Monyet
Had a phonecall from a number I didnt recognise just after two this morning. It was a female voice and sounded a bit familiar. Turned out to be an ex from way back. I mean waaaaay back. "White monkey". We split back in the middle of 2000 I think. She's doing an IT course at the moment. Seems at 2am she was networking some machines -that's dedication, or knowing her she was awake and bored so started tinkering. I called her a geek, she said her tutor looked alot like me. Must be a good looking chappie then :p Anyway she's probably going to be working in Hull soon. She's not someone I can really imagine working anywhere at all for long, the phrase "attention span of a gnat" springs to mind ;) but people change. When we split she was doing her a-levels since then she's got a degree in something. Wonder what she'll make of Julie, wonder what Julie'll make of her. She wants to go clubbing, being into RnB she'd probably not be up for a night of Rammstein and Murderdolls so not my usual haunt, assuming she hasn't changed her mind by then.. hehe. I didn't expect to speak to her anytime soon so it was pretty cool to hear from her.

posted by martin 03:11

Friday, October 29, 2004

It's been a bad week
Last weekend my brother accidentally killed my folks computer. His original intention was to do them a favour by making it quieter but they do say the road to a certain warm place is paved with good intentions.. it went tits up. So yours truly got the job of trying to fix the thing. I've been faffing with it all week. Even missed training for it. Barely seen my girlfriend -and I like seeing her! I've been working on the fucking thing till late at night and not had time to do anything else. I've got cheques to cash from ebay that I've had for a week and not had chance to bank. I've not had time to cook real food, had to do takeaway last night. I wound up doing a late shift today which was a be-atch too. I'm champing at the bit to get out for a beer but it would appear I'm due for a night in. My lady has gone home for the weekend, my housemate's gone out for a bevvy with a chap (which I'm reading as a kind of date), Bill and Mel are at Whitby.. I'm at a loose end. I could pick up the phone but left it a bit late what with spending time on the compter and all. So I'm spending friday night updating the sodding the PC that's occupied my week. Think it'll be finished on Saturday sometime, which probably means I'm not gonna spend tomorrow mooching around Whitby.

Just been chatting on MSN to a young lady who found my profile amusing. She seemed interesting enough and brightened up my evening for a bit.

posted by martin 20:46

Monday, October 25, 2004

Nearly squished.
Whilst walking home for lunch today I got to the zebra crossing and was a bit annoyed to watch a Humberside Police car not stop to let me cross... turns out drivers don't legally have to stop unless you put a foot on the crossing -which means drivers don't need to stop at zebra crossing unless someone steps out in front of them which makes me wonder what the point of zebra crossings really is. Anyway i started to cross and was roughly a quarter of the way over when some pleb in a blue car shot straight over the crossing. I jumped back just in time and the c*nt missed me. I gave his (or her) rear window a couple of clouts but didn't do any damage, after all the police car was only a couple of metres away. Did I mention the police car was a TRAFFIC POLICE volvo? The type of copper that deals with traffic and nothing but traffic stuff? Well that's what it was. I expected to see something like it stop, perhaps do a u-turn and follow the driver or at least ask why I'd just battered the crap out of a blue car but nothing happened.. the bacon boys had failed to notice a blue car travelling in the opposite direction to themselves at speed towards a zebra crossing which they'ed just crossed and seen a pedestrian step out onto and that car failing to stop.. I got home pretty pi5sed off and called the police to let them know just how impressed I was with their performance. The incident got logged as crime number 428 but as I didn't have the registration number of the car there was nothing they could do. Nice one. Council tax well spent there. I said what about all the cctv? It was 12:10 can't you just look on the video tape? Evidently not. Hulls city wide CCTV system does not record, it's "monitored" which means someone has to be watching that particular camera at the exact time an incident occurs for them to be any use ..that's something worth knowing for anyone thinking of a criminal career in the city.

So just remind who was the second worst performing police force in the United Kingdom? Was it perhaps Humberside? Nice to see they're managing to maintain they're less than mediocre standards.

posted by martin 13:58

Saturday, October 23, 2004

Friday! Friday! Friday!

Was gonna spend the evening in and wach a DVD about a huge octopus that sinks ships.. but Cat came home superhappy(tm) after a shopping trip. Her contagious post retail therapy happiness got me to head out to a club. It was just the two of us.. we were gonna walk but grabbed a cab at the first zebra crossing. How lucky is that? I sent Billy a text saying "se u there dude!" but for a change he was staying home :( !!

We got to the club. Loadsa people were already there.. strange. Maybe they actually advertised somewhere? Seemed to be alot of new students walking around with spiderburgers in their hands. Anyway it was a way cool night! (How often have I typed that now?) The place was buzzing, ok mainly new students of a townie set but fuck they're subsidising my club so I'll tolerate them :) Saw Gemma and her mum. Yeah her actual mum.. anyway at some point I was talkin to Gemma when this guy appeared. She said he was one of her bro's mates but I remembered him as being an ex from yay back.. We were talking about my girlfriend but amusingly he thought I was sumrandemblerktryintapuller... she eventually invited us to introduce ourselves to each other. I read his mind because some things are easy and said in my most friendlynicechappie mode "Hi dude! I'm Martin who're you?" He didn't seem too amused, failed the handshake test and said something to Gemma that I couldn't be arsed to listen to.. anyway I found it amusing then headed off leaving a seat for him. Well for ok for Gemma really as she'd given him her seat anyway. What else? Saw tall Paul out. Seems I'm not on the list for the council IT job I went for a while ago as I'm on too high a wage at the moment. He'd been given the job of calling people to say "You failed" but as he knew me my call had fallen to someone else. He was surprised I'd not been called or received a letter yet. Not to worry though. We discussed Kim Wilde's "kids In America". I said it was an exemplary slice of new wave, he said it was pop that totally sucked. Who's right? we'll ever know for sure bt I'll side with me :p What else? I saw pink Emma! Or to be more accurate Red Emma. I wondered why she'd not been in her shop for ages and it turns out she's gone to university in another city! Nice one. She's doing some kind of underwear design course.. sounds quite fun to me hohum. I said to Cat guess what she's doing but she already knew as she knows Emma's boyfriend, Dan, small world.

In the club I was talkin to Dean whilst Wes raked the gambit. Dean had given me a really nice bevvy outside the club last time I was out so I was asking him what the hell it was. Turned out to be something "Baja Rosa". He got me one whilst we were hanging around (Cheers dude!) and I kept the label to remind me. I was surprised Cat didn't like it tho as it tasted really sugary and strawberry like but with the tequila kick we all know and love (yeah and dread).

Right I'm home, Dante's sat on my shoulder, and I'm determined to watch a film about a bloody big octopus. It's called "Octopus" and came free with a £15 DVD player so I'm not hugely optimistic. Might just watch Green Wing instead and go meet Julie at 07:30 when she finshes.. hmm... Gonna make a few cuppa's and hopefully speak to Julie, who's still at work, at some point. Gonna cook pasta now. Ciao.

posted by martin 03:11

Thursday, October 21, 2004

A voice in the ether
Got an email in my hotmail account last from someone I dunno. Seems she looked at my msn profile and thought I'd be a fun person to contact. Julie says I ought to reply. Maybe I will maybe I won't. Haven't got a cyberstalker these days. My last one dissappeared ages ago..

posted by martin 15:37

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Been one of those shit days at work today. The air con hasn't been working for two days, it gets fucking hot in there with a load of computers and monitors kicking out heat.

Dante reappeared tonight after being away for two days. I think he's been in the mad cat lady's place again. Is she ever going to keel over? After training tonight as I was walking home with my mp3 player on some guy said something to me. I took out my head phones and said pardon. He said "This is a bit strange" then asked me which street the prostitutes hang around on. Funnily enough they tend to hang about near the place I train.. so I pointed him in the right direction.. wierd. There wasn't any out when I passed tho -just some middle aged bloke in an expensive car sat doing nothing. Waiting, probably. Like his wife at home, probably...

Spoke to Julie by phone tonight, I don't see her on Monday and Tuesdays because of nightclass and training it's a bit like having a long distance relationship sometimes. When she says she misses me it's warming. We chatted for an hour then I ran a long bath. I was planning to watch some film about a big octopus that I got free but decided against it in favour of trying to get to sleep at a normal time.

posted by martin 00:47

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Thought for the day
Why do the thickest people have the most kids? What happened to Darwinism?

posted by martin 16:23

Sunday, October 17, 2004

Went out in Beverley on Friday night to celebrate Col's birthday a week late. Wound up going to the usual club afterwards were despite having undeer a tenner to my name I got bit tipsy. Saw loads of people out and had a decent good night of it. Saturday was a night in and bloody boring it was too. Apart from friday night it's been one of those crap weekends really.. been hanging around doing nothing. Got a text from Laura on friday about two new piercings she's had done. I said I'd probably pop round and have a look but I've not got round to it, or any work on the dining room, been busy doing nothing at all.. Just done the homework for my nightclass. Julie's back from edinburgh later tonight, that should brighten my evening.

Phone scam
Just before 16:00 on Saturday my landline phone rang, the phone display showed number unavailable. I picked up. It was a recorded message telling me I'd won some kind of prize and needed to call a premium rate (£1.50 per minute) phone number to claim my prize, "The call should last about 5 minutes". Yeah fuck that. My landline and mobile number are both registered with the telephone preference service so I shouldn't get any sales calls and I'm not sure these automatic recorded messages are even legal in this country... so i listened so I could rite down any usefull information before lodging a complaint with the data protection registrar via the TPS. After nearly a couple of minutes the recorded voice said please hang up or press the "#" key to speak to a human operator. I thought what the hey I'll speak to an operator and see where the fuck those shitbags got my number from.. I pressed the hash button. I didn't get through to a human operator though. Instead I got a male recorded voice asking me to enter the pin number for a voicemail system.

I figured after a few attempts it would decline and put me throught to someone or drop the line. It used 4 digit pins, i pressed some random numbers and it did indeed decline my attentions, but it didn't hang up on me.. Well they'ed called me so I figured I'd let them hang up first. So I left it connected for 28 hours. Yup that's 28 hours worth of call time being charged to some dodgy phone scam firm.. that's 28 hours of that line being tied up and unable to bother anyone else with it's recording. At 2 minutes a call that's alot of people who haven't been called.

posted by martin 18:58

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

Went running at lunchtime, did two miles. Go me! Took Mika to the vets after work. She had a steroidal injection and an antbiotic injection, starting tomorrow she's on a 10 day course of antibiotic pills and she's got to wear a buster collar to stop herself licking. Poor thing's been trying to scrap it off against doors and stuff. Went training this evening, had a good session. Decent turnout. Did some bag work then did some work with baseball bats. Spent ages on the phone this evening. Gotta call a technical window measuring guy to get things moving on my double glazing tomorrow.

posted by martin 23:41

Same old same old.
Went to work. Emailed Phil some info on Karoo's DNS servers that their highly trained highly skilled support staff hadn't been able to furnish him with. Funnily enough I actually got turned down for a tech support job with them about 7 years back. Just as well as I'd probably be braindead by now like the rest of their (zero)support team. "You say your having name resolution problems? Err right, you need to reinstall Outlook Express then."

Mika's not getting any better, her penchant for excessive licking has given her weeping sores on her belly and inner thighs so a vets trip is in order. Arranged a lift to do that this evening. I don't know if it's related but she seems to have developed a bit of confidence at last and isn't so intimidated by the male cat.

Night class wasn't to interesting last night. I'm a quarter of the way through the course now though. Bumped into Soran on my way down there, couldn't really stop as I was running late. Later on called Billy an let him know I can indeed set up a website for one of his private clients at about an 8th of the cost they've been quoted by some joker who uses an fsmail address for business. Had a natter with my lancastrian ladyfriend, she's heading to scotland this weekend. So I'll be off the leash for a few days hmm I do miss the leash tho.. ;) Also had a late night text coversation with Zoe.

posted by martin 10:07

Monday, October 11, 2004

Visited the Fair on Saturday. Once again europe's largest travelling fair is in town.. bringing with it traffic chaos, litter, noise pollution, sugary foodstuffs heavy in colouring and crap toys that break after a week. Had a hotdog which was OK, J had some chips, they were cold and tasted a bit raw to me. Haven't been to the fair for years, it's nice to know some things haven't changed. Changes I did notice were a few coffee bars ok stalls then, more variety in the food on offer, and a couple of rides had images ripped off from Sorayama Hajime which I thought was pretty cool, the place wasn't the mudbath I remember with it now being on a tarmacced carpark. Julie's into the sort of ride that involves great height and inertia but figured going on one assembled in an afternoon off the back of a lorry was mebbie a bit risky. We went on a ride called Superbob that I recall going on when I was a kid. It's like a big bumpy centrifuge with a snow machine well ok it was foam really but who cares it was fun.

posted by martin 14:53

Sunday, October 10, 2004

More DIY stuff
Busy weekend working on the dining room. Not a huge amount to show for it yet though. On Friday I filled gaps behind skirting board and then on Saturday Julie and I cut back and sanded off the excess gap filler. I knocked out plaster around the doorway where the architrave is going to go but more plaster came out than I'd planned so gonna have to do some work on that.. Juie cleaned old plaster of brickwork with some hydrochloric acid and a toothbrush. Mine.. On Saturday night we watched a film called "Butterfly Effect" which is one of the best films I've ever seen. We even watched the DVD space-filler I mean "Extra" about chaos theory. Julie's decided that although Chaos Theory sounds reasonable enough the classic example of the butterfly was total bullshit and thought of a better one. I stuck up for the butterfly though.

We didn't get much done on the Sunday as the tools we needed were round at Laura's. We did remove a radiator though, it'll stay off till the room is painted which will be a while yet. Emptied the radiatior with a funnel and a hose pipethe water kept stopping in the pipe though so i had t get it moving by syphoning it. Not a fun job.. kept getting mouthfulls of the central heating water which I've loaded chemicals to protect the system keep it quiet and seal leak. Kept retching whenever I tasted the stuff. Don't think I swallowed enough to do any real damage.

Julie went home to get some sleep before a nightshift and I went to Laura's to get my tools. She wasn't in a fit state to answer the door but brought them round later on. She was very hungover from a party the night before. She looked at the garden and told me she'd been looking over some old video footage she'd shot of it a couple of years previously when I'd just started work on it. I might have a look at it sometime, shame I didn't do before and after pictures really. Couldn't really tell her much of what I've been up to since we last met because she reads it all on here anyway ;p She showed me some video taken on her phone she took in wales and an picture of her twelve fingered friend's hands. Cat appeared in the early evening only to be whisked off to her folks a few minutes later.

I spent most of this evening browsing the internet. Bought a probably dodgy (but very cheap if it works) DVD player online. Just found out I missed a book signing by one of my favourite authors who was in town on Saturday.

posted by martin 23:53

Friday, October 08, 2004

Perfect day
Julie seems to hae been offered a significant sum to go work in Cheshire. Tricky decision she's gotta make.. might be a good move.. it'll get her nearer to Lancaster where she'd rather be.. Interesting times as the chinese say.

On the plus side I got a sexual MOT recently. Got my results today and I'm completely free of nasty bugs, virii and diseases. Yay me.

Strangely I'm not in that good a mood though.. it's Friday too. I could use a night of drunken debauchery to lift my spirits. The type of night where you wake up the next day wondering where all the bites, bruises and scratches came from, how did you get home and why have you both woken up in the wrong room.

posted by martin 14:28

One year with Cat
Strange walk home from work today. A complete stranger with a bloody upper lip greeted me by name as I walked home then on my street I got stuck behind three slow moving very wide people with two prams.

This evening I made a start on out the garden for winter. Haven't done the grass for ages. It looks messy so I'll have to it again next week I think. Waded through a years paperwork, bank stuff, car stuff, mortgage stuff, credit card stuff, pension stuff.. I have too many bank accounts and too many credit cards. Did my homework and wrote up my "reflective notes" for the Study Skills nightclass I'm doing on Mondays. Gave Julie a quick call to wish her luck with an interview tomorrow. I don't think she'll need it though.

Mika, my female cat, has been licking too much and rubbed the skin so she' got the horrible looking weepy grazes on her tummy and legs. I've just rubbed a load of sudocream into it to try and heal it and stop her licking. I think she ate it all off though. Might need a trip to the vet for this one.. just when the cars dead too.

I spent most of the evening chatting with Cat about prettymuch everything. It's hard to believe it's been just over a year since she came her for a couple of weeks to see if we could live together. Just read over the first entry I made after she moved in. I'm glad she did, she's turned out to be the perfect housemate, really easy to live with and good fun. I don't mention her much in this blog but she's become quite an important part of my life.

posted by martin 00:08

Thursday, October 07, 2004

You can't take it with you
Decided to apply for a few credit cards today. They all offer payment protection -which is a total rip off by the way but don't take my word for it read it here. All the credit card firms want you to take it out because it's very lucrative for them, and that of course means costly for the customers.. On onee of the credit card firms you had to choose between "Yes I require payment protection" an "No, I do not require protection and understand that it is still my responsibility to repay the outstanding balance if I am unable to work or in the event of my death." In the inevitable event of my death I very much doubt I'll be worried about paying my credit card bill. Will I be worried about the flames of hell melting my through the soles of my boots, yes, but the credit card? Not likely.

posted by martin 17:35

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Had quite a busy weekend. The previous post was after I'd got home from the club, obviously under the influence.. The guy came round on Saturday morning to give me a quote for double glazing the back of the house and replacing the back door. There's 6 sash windows at the moment which are gonna go, I actualy like sash windows but mine are all old and knackered. Some had bee painted shut and I had to cut them open. Nearly all have broken sash cords and need propping open which is a pain. They're also not too good at keeping the heat in with their antique wafer thin single glazed panes. Well roll in the uPVC double glazed units.. The back door is a mainly glass effort from probably the sixties or seventies. Again it's single glazes and no use for insulation. It's not exactly what you'd call secure either. So out with the old and in with the new.. Just signed the forms for the work to go ahead today. I'm using EYG, I really hope they're better than the bunch of cowboys ColdSeal subbed out my front glazing to six years back.

I've been doing more work on the dining room the past few days. Installing skirting board. It's been a pretty hellish job cutting the fortyfive degree angles to join them.. my cheapo mitre saw turned out to be not up to the job. The skirting board was too tall to fit it properly, that ruled out most moitre blocks too. I tried using a jigsaw set at an angle with a parallel edge guide but that was a total bag of shite. It'll be going back to Argos this weekend. I wound up using a mitre block which takes the board jorizontally then I have to cut at 45 degrees from vertical whislt standing on the thing to keep it still. Took ages. I've managed to get some of the board stuck to the wall at last, might do the rest tonight. Also need to stick up some architrave around the doorframe.

On Monday night I started a nightclass. Study Skills for Returners and Beginners. If I actually get into uni I'll be a returner but I've been out of education about 10 years. The first session was mainly admin. The class is mainly female and more than half are there to support applications for medical courses.

posted by martin 15:30

Saturday, October 02, 2004

Tonight i was headin to the usual club t hook up with Mel and Billy, Julie wasn't coming out because she hates my usual club :-( Anyway as Iwaas leaving the house I sent q text to a coupe of mates. turns out Tat and a few others were in Pave about to heaad off to a club. we shared a cab to Spiders. in the club there was shed loads of people out. I met tall Paul who gave me a job interview in the week, we taalked about how wierd that was.. Also saw loadsa people I haven't seen for ages. wond up prtty hammered. Spent a while talking to Phil from Karate, he has quite an interesting life. Talked to a guy i trained with ages ago about Hull's annual fetish nite. Outside the club Steve rolled up and gave us all a ride home. I'm fuckiing hungry and tired but I have a guy coming round abot double glazing tomorrow morning. Bitch. Did't see Julie tonight which ws a shame. On the plus side saw loadsa people I haven't seen for ages including Jenny. We were gonna swap numbers then I showed her I already had hers. She has a new bloke, nice one!. I got given a postcard with nfo on psychobilly band woohoo! Fuckig cold and tired need to sleeep before tomorrow!

posted by martin 04:10

The Author

Unbalanced opinion and general wittering, sometimes in the small hours after a night out. Legal disclaimer: take all of this as fiction.. Any likenesses to persons, events or companies living, dead, past or present is purely coincidental..

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The Portrait of Dorian Grey
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